The truth? I don’t always feel confident.
I’ve just gotten really good at pretending.
For years, I was invited to speak at big events.
Stages, spotlights… even Caesar’s Palace in Vegas.
And every single time, the same feeling crept in:
“Why me?”
Imposter syndrome. Insecurity. That quiet panic that maybe they got it wrong.
At first, I tried to build myself up by listing accomplishments,
Trying to justify why I belonged there.
But the more I focused on myself, the worse it got.
Then one day, something shifted.
I stopped thinking about me.
And I started thinking about them.
The people in the seats.
What they might be feeling.
What they might need to hear.
And the confidence came—not the fake kind.
The real kind.
Because it stopped being about proving anything…
And started being about connecting.
That same principle holds true in everyday life, too.
There are days I don’t feel great about myself.
But I’ve learned what outfits make me feel good.
Not to impress, but to lift me up just enough to walk out the door and show up.
And when doubt creeps in, I’ve learned to flip the question.
Instead of:
“What’s the worst that can happen?”
I ask:
“What’s the best that could happen?”
That one shift opens a new door.
And confidence walks through it.
But here’s the real secret I’ve learned:
Confidence grows the moment I stop thinking about myself and start pouring into someone else.
It shows up when I notice the quiet woman in the corner and invite her in.
When I offer the compliment that isn’t expected—but deeply needed.
When I see someone’s strength before they do.
That’s what I can’t wait for most when cYou Boutique Coffee + Wine Bar opens.
Not just the lattes or the outfits or the wine nights…
But the chance to help people feel a little more seen,
A little more valued,
And a little more confident than when they walked in.
Because pretending isn’t what we need more of.
Connection is. 💕
